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Wednesday, September 28, 2022

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Review: Source Vape Orb XL

The orb XL vaporizer from SOURCE is a very good product that needs both cannabis flower and extracts, but is designed to cater much more to the extract enthusiast.

You may know that I live with a monkey named Stephan, who is editing my long-running autobiographical novel, The Tiger’s Revenge. I find it hard to stop him from editing these vaporizer reviews, but as in all relationships, boundaries are important. Just because he saved my life on that unfortunate day when the tiger found me doesn’t mean he has to be involved in every aspect of my life.

The orb XL appeared on my desk for review without written instructions. They are easy enough to find online, but Stephan is pretty old fashioned when it comes to the written word. You may recall that Stephan is irritable, and that’s an understatement – I’ve seen him go blindly enraged over vaporizer manuals with poor font choices, not to mention unclear content.

So when he heard the news that the bol XL had no booklet, no user manual at all, I set myself on the worst (he can destroy our apartment with astonishing speed). Instead, Stephan just became quiet and withdrawn. I started to get scared of what he was up to.

With an uneasy eye for hurled projectiles—I still have a thesaurus-shaped bruise on my head—I assembled and charged the device. The many different parts of this vape require a lot of screws to attach the whole thing together; I imagine this is quite satisfying for take control types and it adds to the solid feel of the product. But I felt like I was on a conveyor belt, and when I screwed the USB charger into the long battery stem and plugged it into my PC, it stuck out rather awkwardly, even obscenely, from the front.

Charging the device requires two more long unscrews, one to break the tapered mouthpiece from the base and then screw it into the battery stem, and another to remove an atomizer from the base. Source is very proud of “the world’s first Grade 1 Titanium (Gr1) Quartz Triple Coil Atomizers”, and the $89.95 package contained two: one for herbs and another for extracts, ostensibly. Exactly how much “Grade 1 Titanium” is included is uncertain.

I tried dry flowers; the bol XL’s preference for extracts was immediately apparent. You can fit very little cannabis flower in the atomizer and the vapor flow is weak. But with a load of wax or oil, this vaporizer delivers a very strong high.

Extract vapes are often too much for me, but the orb XL’s features help moderate their power. A rather clever dial on the bottom of the battery stem adjusts the voltage and corresponding heat, and a clever rotating piece on the base allows more or less airflow. With the voltage low and the airflow restricted, drawing on the XL sphere can be almost civilized. Those looking to top Hunter S. Thompson are welcome to turn these settings all the way up.

By the way, register if you have found an oil or wax that tastes good. They are always industrial and off-putting to my palate – wait. What does Stephan do with my computer?

People of San Francisco. Hear me.

I am going to these pages to inform you that we monkeys are watching you closely. You can’t know our numbers or how well hidden we are. To ensure our tolerance — and your survival — you must provide fruit, marijuana, beer, and canned dog food, especially from fire escapes in the Tenderloin.

Little bit with us and you will know our wrath. Your suffering will be horrible.

The man known as Claude Balzac, despite his desperate mediocrity, must be advanced large sums of money. Somebody, enter Aces and pay his bill, or we’ll punch you in the ass.

If you’re still confused, we’re threatening you with a Planet of the Apes-style takeover. Mayors and councils are easy to fill with our species. A monkey was planning commissioner for months before anyone noticed. We’re already halfway there.

That’s all.


Cool Factor: The glossy finish (“black chrome” according to the manufacturer) is hip and the carrying case is a plus. The shape of a tulip bulb does contain a hint of sex toy design, though, so your mileage will vary depending on how much this appeals to you.

practical: For dry herb, the loading capacity is too small. For concentrates, it is more than acceptable. On the go, the user won’t be able to struggle with these sticky substances, but a good load prepared before leaving home will keep a body high all afternoon.

Affordability: At $89.99, the Orb XL offers voltage-corrected, powerful pull and rock solid battery life. Excellent value compared to less substantial extract pens in this price range.

General: There are quite a few parts here so it takes a bit of elbow grease to screw them all together. This may appeal to those who liked their Lego a little too much as kids and try the patience of those who prefer instant gratification. But if concentrates are your thing, this is a very reliable and adaptable high. Dried flower lovers may look elsewhere.

Rating: 4/5

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